You're On My Heart Just Like A Tattoo

Tonight, I got bored and watched the last 30 minutes of American Idol. I DON'T KNOW WHY, OKAY? Paula Abdul is crazy. I plan on getting Sass Jordan on the phone and begging her not to turn into a bucket of crazy this summer.

Anyway, I watched 3 contestants do their thang, and decided to post my thoughts about their performances.

Now, let's all keep in mind that this is the most Idol I have ever watched, ever. Before this, all I ever saw was the Honey Nut Cheerios recap while waiting for something else to come on. So I have no idea who these people are outside of the blog-iverse.

The first guy I saw sing was Michael Johns. It was a Beatles-themed night, so he sang Across the Universe. (Silly moi, I had no idea this was actually the title of a Beatles song until tonight. See? AI CAN enhance your life.

Anyway, all I have to say about Michael is that I LOVED him. I don't know if it's because the song is awesome or because he's awesome or a combination therein, but I got shivers in the spine as soon as he started singing. It was fantabulous.

The next singer was Kristy Lee Cook. As soon as her pre-performance interview started, I started gushing. Out loud. To myself, as there was no one else in the room. She's friggin aDORable. Kristy sang Eight Days A Week, country style. I thought she was doing a good job right up until the horrendous last note, but Simon Cowell thought otherwise, and when he compared her performance to a cheap, small-town county fair show, I couldn't help but agree. It was pretty hokey.

Finally, I saw the famous David Archuleta sing We Can Work It Out. I have no idea whether I liked his performance or not because I could not get past the lip-licking. What the crap, David? Ever heard of Vaseline, man? My only other thought was "Holy High School Musical, Batman!" The guy is a shoe-in for Zac Efron's understudy, for real.